The Daily Martian Weather Report

How's your winter been so far? Kinda cold? Don't you wish the weather guys and gals would get it right for once. If you forget your umbrella, it rains. If you only wear a sweater, it turns cold and snows. It is tough to predict the weather, after all it is a game of numbers and percentages. If you think it's tough to predict the weather here, think what it would be like on a planet like Mars. Actually, today's Warped site helps you make that choice.

The name of the site is The Daily Martian Weather Report, and it is brought to you by the Mars Global Surveyor Radio Science Team. Here you can learn about the rules for forecasting the weather on one of our closest neighbors in the solar system. There are about 8 years of records here since they started keeping them in January 1998. The latest Martian meteorological measurements from the team will be posted regularly on this page. They use the method of radio occultation to make observations of the structure of the martian atmosphere. The mapping phase of the MGS mission began in March, 1999 and concluded in January, 2001 after one complete Martian year. The extended mapping mission began that same January and has continued to this date.

So if you are concerned about a high of 98 degrees F, or a low of 20 degrees, you can take heart with the weather reported here. Mars has temps ranging from -87 degrees F to -192 degrees F, depending on the time of year (don't forget their years are about twice as long as Earth's). Remember the old saying: Whether it's cold or whether it's hot, we've go to have weather, whether or not. Warped rating is 7.5.

http://nova.stanford.edu/projects/mgs/dmwr.html

Gene Simmons.com

It used to be, in the good old days, rock stars were party animals, giving credence to the motto "Sex, Drugs, and Rock and Roll". What has happened to those good ol' days? Why aren't they like they used to be? One reason is that many of the hard core rock'n'rollers are no longer with us. As in not living. As in assumed room temperature. As in dead. But the ones that remain have slowed way down. They may still party all night long, but now they include their family in one way or another. Many have diversified (some would say sold out, but to each his own) and dabble in more than music. Today's Warped site subject has done all of it, and then some.

Gene Simmons.com is the online personification of one of the legends of rock'n'roll. Over 30 years ago, he confounded the group KISS. After achieving legendary status in the rock world, he (and KISS) branched out into other areas of the business world, not just musically. KISS is one of the most widely licensed acts of all time in any field, with over 2500 separate deals. They dabble in NASCAR, have a comic book line, own a camera, a coffee house, a Holiday Inn, and even Pepsi and Coca Cola have competed for their likenesses. Gene has several shows, such as Rock School and Family Jewels, as well as a smash cartoon series My Dad The Rock Star. He has discovered other groups, and given them a start in the business, such as Van Halen, and managed others, such as Liza Minelli.

Gene is an incredible person, who has a beautiful wife and adorable kids. But you can see his wild side here, which makes him our kinda Warped person. Give this site an 8.5 rating so we can party all night long.

http://www.genesimmons.com/

Jesus Christ, Superstore

In this day and age, anyone can make a few bucks doing just about anything. Ebay has changed the way we do business, and with that increase in buying power comes an increase in product, both in amount and type. Today we look at a site that is selling items that at first seem sacrilegious, but underneath have a positive message.

The name of the site is Jesus Christ, Superstore. Their mission is to put the fun back into fundamentalism, and the laughter back into sectarian laughter. Here you can purchase bendable and poseable action figures, ala GI Joe. Jesus Christ Superstore is the one-stop-shop for all the theological needs you will ever need. In a world of pick and mix religion, instant karma and instant noodles how do we find our one true path? Who is truly righteous? Could Jesus take Mohammed in a one on one? Maybe, but Buddha will take you all on... This range of anatomically correct 1:ƒ scale religious figures will help guide you through the false profits of today's secular seclusion

This is an interesting stop, one that could be looked as a rebuff to religion, or one that can be positive in the way it helps to spread the Word. Either way, it is an interesting and unique use of the Internet's bandwidth. The Warped rating on this site is 6.5.

http://www.jesuschristsuperstore.net/

Moon Landing - A Hoax

Did he or didn't he? Did we or didn't we? Did they or didn't they? What am I referring to, you are most likely asking yourself right about now. According to some people, I am referring to the greatest hoax ever perpetrated by the US Government. To others, it's all a bunch of hogwash. You'll have to decide for yourself.

THe name of the site is Moon Landing - A Hoax. It is a sight that is dedicated to the concept that the United States really did not send men to the moon in the 1960's and 1970's. It is actually an ad for a book that tries to sell that concept, with links to sights that support the author's theories. Having lived through those times, I can say that on the surface, it seems like a bunch of hogwash. But there are some theories that are advanced here, and you'll have to make up your mind for yourself on the subject.

The President has announced that he would like the United States to return to the Moon by the year 2020. That is a great program, since the benefits that we reaped from the first space program are still with us today. If you doubt that, then answer the question where did velcro come from? See, now you know what I mean. The rating on this site is an 8.0, just for being so weird.

http://www.primeline-america.com/moon-ldg/

Klingon Gallery

Today's Warped site is not an advertisement for a laundry detergent or clothes drying aid. It is, in fact, a fan site dedicated to one of the most popular (in some circles, THE most popular) science fiction series of all times. So stand by to boldly go where no man has gone before. Warp factor 8, Mr. Sulu.

The name of the site is The Gallery of Klingon Warriors. Now, for those of you who have been hibernating for the past 30 or so years, or have been in galaxies unknown to us, Klingons are the sworn enemies of the crew of the Star Ship Enterprise, under the command of one James Tiberius Kirk. There are countless television episodes, movies, books, novels, and other paraphernalia to mention that are dedicated to the show. This site is one that has a twist to it.

If you have wanted to be the bad guy, and go after Kirk and company, now you can look the part, as well as being the part. This gallery of warriors is just waiting for you. All you need to do is send in your picture, and in a few short star dates, you are a Klingon Warrior, with a picture to prove it. This would be perfect gift for the Star Trek fan who has everything. Now he can experiment with his dark side. The Warped rating on this site is a 7.5 on a scale of 10. May the Force be with you...ooppss. Sorry wrong sci-fi world. I meant to say "Live long and prosper".

http://www.hotink.com/warriorgallery/

The Sorcerer's Apprentice

It's not Halloween, but this site was so cool and weird that it just couldn't wait until October. It is really way out, and has a real Harry Potter/Hogwarts feeling to it. So for a spooky time in the old town tonight, click on to today's Warped site.

The name of the site is The Sorcerer's Apprentice. The Sorcerer's Apprentice is the ORIGINAL occult supplier in Europe when hardly any other occult shop existed. They carry genuine Occult Paraphernalia, Rare Ingredients and Psychic Equipment which are unique and unobtainable elsewhere, and have been doing so for over 31 years. Need a Ouija board? They got it. How about an exorcism? Got it. Hexing and unhexing charms, magical oils, parchments, magical inks, you name it they have it. I have not seen such a complete selection of material outside of Diagon Alley. Plus you don't have to go through the Leaky Cauldron to get there either.

So if you know of a budding young wizard or warlock, this is the site for them. It a completely legitimate site, one that can be educational as well as entertaining. The Warped site rating on this site is a 9.5.

http://www.sorcerers-apprentice.co.uk/

Dumb Network

One of Jim Carey's most popular movies was "Dumb and Dumber". A couple of wild and crazy guys and their adventures in the middle of winter. Well, today's Warped site takes the concept of dumb and elevates it to a new height. Get ready to read about some folks and events that are sure to qualify for the Darwin Awards.

The site is called Welcome to the Dumb Network. Here you'll find a collection of some of the craziest laws, wackiest facts, and tons of other ridiculous things. There's more information here than you can shake a stick at, so grab a drink and plan to stay a while. You are invited to become a member, which gives you the privilege to vote in polls, submit trivia, stories, and other neat information. Some of the subjects are: Dumb Bumpers, Dumb Laws, Dumb Warnings, and Dumb Criminal Acts. You say you want some examples:

"Charles Dickens slept facing North. He thought it improved his writing" (Dumb Facts)

" It's God's job to forgive Bin Laden... It's our job to arrange the meeting -USMC" (Dumb Bumpers)

"Drivers must yield to pedestrians who are standing on the sidewalk" (Dumb Laws, Oregon).

As for the last, I live there, and it is true. There are other and even more ridiculous dumb things at this site, so be prepared to hang there for awhile. Warped rating on this site is 8.5 out of 10.

http://www.thedumb.com/

Dog Person

A few year ago, I broke down and got my wife a dog for her birthday. Actually I just gave my permission for her to go pick one out. She got a miniature poodle, mostly because she has dog allergies and they have hair not fur. Well, here is it, three years later, and we now have a new Lord and master around our house. Just as the kids are big enough to go out on their own, we wind up with another mouth to feed. Well, at least with this one I know my place. Today's site is one that will show how I found that out.

The name of the site is You Know You're a Dog Person When.... It sort of reminds one of Jeff Foxworthy if he did animal jokes. But if you have a four legged friend around your house, you will be able to identify with at least one of these.

"You have 32 different names for your dog. Most make no sense, but he/she understands".

"You have a kiddie wading pool in the yard, but no small children".

"You refer to yourselves as Mommy and Daddy".

"You keep an extra water dish in your second-floor bedroom, in case your dog gets thirsty at night (after all, her other dish is WAY down on the first floor...)".

If you have a dog, you know what I mean. You're probably thinking "been there, done that, got the leash to prove it" right now. Dogs are man's best friends, and as this page shows, man is also dog's best friend as well. Rating for this site is a 7.0.

http://www.merriewood.com/dogpersn.html

Cool Quiz

A little knowledge can be dangerous. A lot of knowledge can be even more so. But a whole lot of knowledge will give you today's Warped site. So put on your thinking cap and lets head over to Cool Quiz.

The name of the site reflects what it is all about. It is about quizzes, you know the kind we hated in school, and it's a pretty cool site. After spending sometime here, I'm sure you'll agree. Among the interesting topics covered here, there is trivia, puzzles, humor, games, and quizzes. What kind of stuff do those categories contain? For example, there is:

The Word of the Day: fictioneer;

Fact of the Day: When did Ronald McDonald make his first television appearance;

and last but not least:

Today In History: Whose birthday is it today?

(If you thought I was going to give you the answers, you gotta be kidding. Go look them up on the site for yourself. I did).

This is a great site to visit if you've got a hot game of Trivial Pursuit coming up, or if you're just wanting to impress your friends and neighbors. Rating on this site is a 7.0 out of a possible 10.

http://www.coolquiz.com/trivia/

The Hockey Puck

By the title of today's website, you might think it is sports oriented. But you are wrong. You are so wrong. It is a site that salutes, IMHO, the funniest comedian ever to grace a stage, screen, or television set. So pay attention, dummy, and read on.

The name of the site is The Hockey Puck. It is an unofficial site for Don Rickles, long time comedian and actor. He has been known as the master of insults, the merchant of venom, or Mr. Warmth. He was very popular on during the television talk show heydays of the 60's and 70's. I used to stay up late to catch him on Johnny Carson, Joey Bishop, Mike Douglas, the list goes on. He was the master of throwing out insults and making people laugh. He could seem to be very callous, but deep inside, he was a sweet person. Here you can read about his upcoming appearances, his biography and filmography and tv appearances. You can even contact him here for a certified genuine autograph.

So if you dummies out there want a good belly laugh, catch Don the next time he's on your choice of entertainment. You will be rolling in the aisles. Until then, this site will have to do. Warped rating is 7.5 out of 10.

http://www.thehockeypuck.com/main.html

Rapper Dentist Daddy

Going to the dentist can be scary. But today's Warped site is on that makes the trip a little more interesting, at least in a cerebral sense. So click on the link below, and away you go.

The name of the site is Rapper Dentist Daddy & Hip Hop Dentistry. For years, Dr. Cunning has been known by many as “The Dentist to the Stars,” but it was not until one of the Mega-Stars asked for a sparkling set of golden teeth with diamonds, that he acquired the nicknames “Rapper Dentist Daddy” and “Hip Hop Dentist.” Many of today’s top pop artists have become our patients. Whether the goal is a beautiful white “Hollywood Smile,” stunning silver or
rich yellow gold crowns, Cunning Dental Group is the place where many stars come for celebrity treatment.

So if you are looking for that special look, that unique look that will make your smile stand out in a crowd (in a positive way), check out Rapper Dentist Daddy. He has the tools that will get you the looks. Warped rating: 7.5 out of 10.

http://hiphopdentistry.com/

U.S. Army Research Laboratory

The commericials on television show how we can make our children strong. But if they join a certain military organization, they will make them Army strong. But the US Army is more than guns and marching and protecting our country's interests. Today's Warped site shows just how diverse that it really is.

The is the Army Research Laboratory. Their mission and motto is "America’s Laboratory for the Army: Many Minds, Many Capabilities, Single Focus on the Soldier". The Army Research Laboratory (ARL) is the Army’s corporate basic and applied research laboratory. Their mission in research is to provide innovative science, technology, and analysis to enable full-spectrum operations anywhere in the world. It consists of the Army Research Office (ARO) and six Directorates-- Weapons and Materials, Sensors and Electron Devices, Human Research and Engineering, Computational and Information Sciences, Vehicle Technology, and Survivability and Lethality Analysis. The Army relies on this ARL Team for scientific discoveries, technologic advances, and analyses to provide warfighters with capabilities to succeed on the battlefield.

Besides being all that they can be, the US Army is a juggernaut in the world of technology, as this site shows. How big is some what nebulus, and most likely classified. But they are still on the bleeding edge of technology, which is always exciting. The Warped rating on this site is 6.5 on a scale of 10.

http://www.arl.army.mil/main/Main/default.htm

Toshiba/Microsoft Saga

Sometimes the little guy does win the big battles. I came across this story on a website about one user's desire to not use Windows, and the process that he went through in dealing with both Microsoft and Toshiba. It is a little old, but it is still a fascinating story that shows when you're right, you're right.

The whole story starts when Geoffrey Bennett purchased a Toshiba laptop, and did not want to use the enclosed Microsoft Windows operating system. He wanted to use Linux. So all he wanted was a computer, a piece of hardware. But since he wasn't using Windows, he didn't want to pay for it. He wanted his money back. What follows in the emails he has documented here is an insite into just how powerful Microsoft is, and how ruthless they can make the hardware vendors who sell their software. It is an interesting story, one which I am sure many of us can relate to. So enjoy, and remember, all you have to do is what you think is right. You'll win in the long run.

http://www.bringbackkirk.com/

BringBackKirk

One of the most famous detectives of all times was once killed off, and then resurrected from the dead. Sherlock Holmes made a miraculous escape from his "death" at a Reichenbach Falls in the northern Swiss Alps. His return was at the insistance of loyal fans everywhere who demanded his resurrection. We are facing a similar situation today, one that has attracted this sites attention, and whole hearted support.

The name of the site is BringBackKirk.com, and it is THE site dedicated to the principle that Captain/Admiral James T. Kirk was erroniously killed in one of the Star Trek movies, and that he needs to be brought back to life, somehow.

"The universe hangs in the balance.
One man, thought to be dead, is the only one who can save it.
The time has come to turn death into a fighting chance to LIVE!
And a legend... will return! "

That is their philosophy and mission. Here you can learn about the reasoning for his demise in the movie "Star Trek: Generations", and the groundswell of support for it's inappropriate killing of him. The idea of James T. Kirk ending up falling off a bridge and splatting on the base of a mountain has boggled the minds of Trek fans for years. That's not what the character is about. And as was the case when NBC cancelled Star Trek so long ago, the fans have risen up and launched the campaign to Bring Back Kirk. The first attempt to revive the series was not successful, but there is hope here that this will have a different outcome.

So express your opinions, communicate with others of the same mind set, and who knows, maybe someday he will be taking to where no man has gone before...again.

http://www.bringbackkirk.com/

Homer Simpson Random Quote Generator

Okay, pay attention. Today you will be given the opportunity to hear from one of our great American entertainers. The words that come from him, you will cherish and tell your friends about. So without further ado, let us click on and see who it is.

The site is the Homer Simpson Random Quote Generator. Here you will hear pearls of wisdom from the head of America's most famous animated family. For example:

"Be quiet, Brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip"; or

"Asleep at the switch? I wasn't asleep, I was drunk!"; or

"Marge! Look at all this great stuff I found at the Marina. It was just sitting in some guy's boat!"; and

"AHHH. Donuts. . . What can't they do."

You get the idea. This site can spark glowing conversation around the office cooler, or be a great ice breaker at, well, where ever you need an ice breaker. The Warped rating on this site is 9.0, but then we've always had a soft spot for Homer.

http://smacie.com/randomizer/simpsons/homer.html?x=49&y=161

The Cosmic Ray Deflection Socitey of North America, Inc.

Never let it be said that the Warped site of the Day is one to pass a chance to provide a public service to society. If there is some activity or event that we feel could have an impact on all of us, then we'll give up our site so that we are all informed with information on said event or activity. That being said, today we feature a site that is something we should all be concerned about.

The site is called The Cosmic Ray Deflection Society of North America, Inc. This is an organization that, since 1984, has been concerned and warning about the dangers of cosmic rays. Knowing, that in some future time, when the ozone layer has been further destroyed by man-made chemicals such as fluorocarbons and exhaust fumes, the earth and it's inhabitants will be mercilessly bombarded by deadly cosmic rays, the Cosmic Ray Deflection Society of North America, Inc. has been organized to discover ways of surviving the coming onslaught.

Here you will learn all about the latest theories of how we are affected, and what can be done to limit them. According to the site, it all starts with the hat. Just look at the top of the web page and you'll see what I mean. There are many related sites here, along with theories that will warp your soul and curve your spine, and help the commies win the war (kudos to George Carlin). Somewhere on this site I'm sure you will run into Al Gore, a man who has intercepted his share of cosmic rays. The Warped rating on this site is 9.0 out of a possible 10, for sheer weirdness and warpedness (is that a word?).

http://www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/1483/graf.html

The Complete & Utter Idiot's Guide To Making a Baloney Sandwich

Growing up I ate a lot of baloney sandwiches. I mean A LOT OF baloney sandwiches. My mom used to buy the baloney at the butcher, where it was sliced the way she wanted it (this was WAY before super markets changed the way we bought out food). It was simple process. You just take two slices of bread, throw some baloney in-between them, assemble, and eat away. Boy, was I wrong, as today's Warped site shows.

The name of the site is the Complete & Utter Idiot's Guide to Making a Baloney Sandwich. Here you will find an in-depth analysis of just how this staple of the American lunch table is prepared. Step by step directions are included, divided into small bits so that even the most simple of us can prepare this wonderful lunch delight.

This site has no frills or pretensions about it. It is simple and straight forward. It will solve all of your lunch needs, and answer your most thought provoking questions about baloney sandwiches. It also has a Warped rating of 8.5 out of a possible 10.

http://www.brunching.com/idiotsandwich.html

Captain Euro

What the world needs in these terrible times is someone we can look up to. Someone who stands for truth, justice, and who knows the difference between right and wrong, and bad from evil. What we need is someone like the subject today's Warped site.

The name of the site is Captain Euro, Europe's Superhero, or Europas Superhelt, or Der Europaische Superheld, or Le Superhero De L' Europe. Whatever language you say it in, it is adventure and fun. The futuristic science fiction-based story is comic strip oriented, sort of like reading the Sunday funnies. Captain Euro and his team were formed by the European Union to head the Twelve Stars Organization to defend the security of Europe and uphold the values of the union.

Here you meet his sidekicks Europa, Erik, Helen, Marcus, Lupo, and Pythagoras1. Together, as the ambassadors for global peace, they spread that message wherever they go, by solving problems and averting danger. There are some pretty cool gadgets that they have at their disposal. These include Eurovisors, T-Gap, Euroutfit, Eurostunner, Eurocorde, and Euroracer. But every superhero needs an archrival, and Captain Euro's is one named Dr. D. Vader, who along with Junior, Mala, Ninot, and the twins make life very interesting for the Twelve Stars Organization.

This site reminds me a lot of Speed Racer, and to a lesser extent, the old Clutch Cargo and Space Angel shows from the early 1960's. The Warped site rating on this fun site is an 8.5 out of 10.

http://www.captaineuro.com/

Top Hogs, Dogs, and Parrots

Have you ever tried teaching an old dogs new tricks? Or an old hog? How about your friendly neighborhood parrot? No luck with any of them? It's fun watching animals do funny things. Think I'm wrong, just ask Dave Letterman or Jay Leno. Better yet, just look at today's Warped site.

The name of the site is Top Hogs, Dogs & Parrots. This is a web site that is about the world's most amazing performing animals. They do the funniest and most amazing stunts you have ever seen. Top Hogs, Dogs & Parrots offers three unique lighthearted animal acts for all occasions, and are VERY family oriented entertainment. Here you can where they have appeared, when they will be appearing near you. There are articles on where and how they live with, among others, a wild boar, Clydesdales, miniature donkeys, and cats.

The acts are named Bacon & Porkchop Show, The Super Pork Show, The Thunderbirds Show, and The Super Pets Show. To quote Jay Leno, "Pigs like this only come around once in a lifetime", and "The most talented pigs in the world..." The Warped rating for this site is 7.5 out of a possible 10.

http://www.tophogs.com/

The Surreal-A-Tron 8000

Have you ever wanted to be a writer? To see your works in prints, or on the Internet? Having the urge to do it can be one thing. Having the talent, however, can be an obstacle. But if you use today's Warped site, you can get some good ideas on how to create some interesting writing.

The site is called The Surreal-A-Tron 8000. It is subtitled "Generate fantastical voyages into the mind of a sociopath. Just add water". It is a website that uses a "fill in the blank" approach to create some unusual writings. Here is an example from the first sentence:

"The sun was ( ) as ( ) made ( ) way ( ) up the ( ) road." Where the parentheses are, you have choice of phrases or words to choose from to insert into the story. After The sun was, you can choose "made of crisps", "blue with rage and giggles", "God stricken", or "unbearably frigid". So you can see how the story can turn out. It isn't Hemmingway or Shakespeare, but it does provide some interesting reading.

Here is a chance to practice your writing skills. There isn't anything that you can do with this except print it out and share with some friends, or maybe put it on your blog. The Warped rating of this site is 9.0, making it one of the better sites that we've run across lately.

http://www.the-emporium.demon.co.uk/surreal.htm

Welcome to Moon Shop

Have you ever wanted a home of your own? Some land, out in the middle of nowhere, where you can go and just unwind and take it easy? Land is so expensive these days, it is hard to do that. But there may be an answer to this problem, thanks to the Warped site today.

The name of the site is Welcome to Moon Shop. It is amazing but true, believe it or not, that you can own a plot of land on the Moon. That's right, planet Earth's closest neighbor, the Moon is for sale... sort of. For only the small sum of $19.99 you get a one acre parcel located on the Moon, along with the legal paperwork that shows where you land is, and serves as proof that you own it. This parcel is registered with the United Nations, the United States, and the Russian government. This transaction is handled by the Lunar Embassy, the only recognized world authority for the sale of Lunar and other Planetary Real Estate (including Mars).

So if you're looking for a gift for your favorite Trekker, or for the man who has everything (or woman), this is an out this world gift that they would appreciate. The rating on this site is a 7.5 out of a possible 10.

http://www.moonshop.com/pm/lunar.html

God Laughs Dot Net

Having a sense of humor means that you can get through any situation with laugh. Sometimes you have to wonder why you're in the situation that you're in, that maybe God is getting even with you. Have you ever considered that God may have a sense of humor as well? Read on.

The name of the site is God Laughs Dot Net. It is run by Pastor Rus, looks at the humorous side of God. Yes, that's right, God does indeed have a humorous side and that is exactly what this site is all about. A humorous look at good clean religious humor. He accepts submissions for God humor, and in turn sends the material out in the form of a Collage making reading quite easy. Many may consider this site a sacrilegious or demeaning to religion. I take the opposite approach. A loving God is one who would want his children to be happy and carefree, and enjoying a good laugh is part of that happiness.

It is nice to be able to laugh at some good clean jokes for a change. I haven't heard such good humor since Red Skeleton went off television. The Warped rating on this site is 8 out of a possible 10. Be sure to check out the Church of Legos when you visit.

http://www.godlaughs.net/

Welcome to Crunchy Gods

The title of today's site first attracted me because of it's title. Then the main entry page caught my eye (it's very cerebral). After that, it was all downhill. See if you agree with me or not.

The name of the site is Welcome to Crunchy Gods. To enter the site, you have to select the left brain or right brain (hence the cerebral aspect of the site). This site is a collection of links that reflect the philosophy and lifestyle of the author. They are quite interesting sites, such as a page for Walnut, Illinois, the Orwellian Fun Page, and Linky Linky. What makes the much fun is the right brain/left brain approach. Once you click the site, you have to choose the side you want (as I mentioned before). The differences between the two is striking, and make this site fun.

The rating on this site is 8.5 (from my right brain), and a 7.5 (from my left brain). You can try this test on yourself as well.

http://www.crunchygods.com/

SmartUniverse

Firesign Theatre used to have a line from one of their routines that was very interesting. It was "How can you be two places at once, when you're really nowhere at all?" That saying really sums up the concept for today's Warped site.

The site is called SmartUniverse, the First Virtual Nation. No taxes, no land mass, no war. It is a slap at royalty, normalcy, and the status quo. It is a very interesting place to visit, and an interesting concept in what a virtual world can be. There are some interesting articles, both by the monarch, and the spokesman for the monarch. You will see that people from over 87 countries (and the Gaza Strip) have signed up. Citizenship is free, as is their newsletter. You can even join the Royal Family. Be sure to check out the photo section. You will be amazed at just how far reaching this concept can be.

This site has tongue in cheek written all over it. But is raises some interesting topics for discussion. The rating on this is site is an 8.0. But that is only a virtual one, keeping up the spirit of the site.

http://www.smartuniverse.com/

Crazy Asian Drinks

In my wild and crazy younger years, when I was in the Navy, I tried to live up to the stereotype of what I thought was a sailor. That is to be hardworking at sea, and then get good and plastered while on liberty. Going steaming was what it was called, and eventually I grew up and grew out of that phase in my life. But while I was in it, some of the drinks I had were ones that defied description. Things like screwdrivers, cuba libres, grasshoppers, and other more memorable ones that I can't recall after 30 years. But today's Warped site we look at some drinks that would put the ones I sampled to shame.

The name of the site is Crazy Asian Drinks. This is a site that features some of the most unusual and outlandish drinks from the Far East. Some of these one would have to be crazy to sample, or at least three sheets to the wind. The names alone are enough to make one hesitate. Things like Pearl Milk Tea, Pocari Sweat, Soursop Juice, and Foco Tamarind Juice. Each drink has it's own page, explaining what it is (and quite some detail) and some of the pluses and minuses of that concoction. There is also a FAQ that expounds on the site philosophy, staff bios, a newsletter, and some very interesting links.

Now, I don't advocate anyone go out and get smashed to have a good time. I relate it here only as a phase of my life that I went through. I wouldn't want to do it again, but I would not trade the experience for the world. Of course, the times I was praying in front of the porcelain are enough to ever think about doing anything like that again. The rating on this site is a 7.0 out of a possible 10.

http://www.noapologiespress.com/presents/asiandrink/

The Gyros Project

Today's website is about a sandwich. I guess that will teach me to search for sites while I'm hungry. But I guess it really couldn't be classifed as a sandwich. I guess it's like a salad, or rather, well, I 'm just not sure what you would call it. Heck, I can't even pronounce it. But you can read about by just clicking onward.

The site is called The Gyros Project. It is a study, a presentation if you will, of the signs in Chicago that have become well known over the years. They are appreciated by both visitors and residents alike. Here you can see these masterpieces of art, in which anonymous artisans have rendered a staple of the culinary underclass into an art form, and put that transcendence on the street corner. Fast food is not the usual subject of creative vision, nor ramshackle shacks and under-the-El storefronts its usual location, but that makes this accidental outdoor art show all the more pleasing. These snacks are snacks are name only. In some of these locations, you get them so large you won't need eat dinner or breakfast, they are so filling.

When I was growing up, Gyros was a character in Walt Disney comics. Now I see that it is actually an epicurean delight from Greece. Great food, in a great city. The Warped site rating for this site is a 7.0.

http://www.interestingideas.com/roadside/gyros/gyros.htm

Pun Of The Day

Need a good laugh to start your day? How about a good groaner, one that will make you the hit of the office water cooler during break time? Today's Warped site is on that will ensure that your humor is remembered long after you have left the building.

The name of the site is Pun of the Day. It is a collection of puns, those short, witty sayings that while not being totally hilarious, are fun to tell and retell. What makes a good pun? Usually it has some sarcasm in it, and it tends to either make one look bad, or someone else look even worse. For example, here are the best ones I have found here:

"Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now."

"I dropped out of my communism class because of lousy Marx."

"He was able to listen to his favorite radio show in the morning because he had an AM radio."

"Western movie actors love to be scene and not herded."

There are more there, believe me that are both better and worse than these. It seems that Rodney Dangerfield would have had a field day at this site. If you have one that they don't have here, you can submit it to them, and share your groans with everyone else. The Warped rating on this site is 8.0.

http://www.punoftheday.com/

WWE Divas

When I was growing up and Pro Wrestling was the main rage, the female side of the sport was not as interesting as it is today. If you've ever seen a picture of the Fabulous Moolah, you'll know what I mean. The WWE has raised the bar as far as women's participation in this form of sports entertainment, and the results are, well, the results. Click on and you'll see what I mean.

The site is called WWE Divas, and is dedicated to the ladies of the Vince McMahon's pro wrestling empire. They are gorgeous to look at, wonderful to oogle at, and they even have some athletic ability in the ring. All you have to do here to see them in action is click on their picture.

You can view videos, still, bios, and a whole lot more of Ashley, Candice, Jillian, Kristal, Mickie, and many, many more. There are special sections featuring the Divas in some specialized attire, such as Halloween, Cheerleaders, Lingerie, and some top matches between them. There is a title history, as well as links to other parts of the WWE wrestling world.

Pro wrestling has sure changed in the years since I started watching it. This site really shows just how much it has. Be sure to search around the site for the Tribute to the Troops link where you can see how the WWE and ECW wrestlers took a little bit of home to the troops who are over there. Rating on this site is a 9.5 out of 10. Gotta love all of the wallpaper material on the site, for sure.

http://www.wwe.com/superstars/divas/

Tacky eMail

Growing up, the main source of communication was writing letters and post cards. Not email, not cell phones, not the Internet. But good old fashioned, pen and paper and a postage stamp. My kids have never known that form of communication, and they most likely never will. But thanks to today's website, they can experience some of the joy of sending postcards.

The name of the site is the Tacky Postcard Archive. Here you can look at picture postcards from years gone by. This was what you used to receive from friends on vacation, usually with the message "Having a wonderful time, wish you were here", etc. etc.

Now you can send these same cards via Internet email to your friends. Whatever the occasion, either vacation, holiday, get well, or just thinking of you, all of the reason are here. They are well divided up, and easy to find. Some of them are more adult oriented than others, so a close look is advised before sending them. It is easy to communicate using postcards, after all a picture is worth a thousand words.

When I was in the service, it was great getting mail from home. One of my grandmothers used to send me a postcard every week. You could set you calendar with her post cards and how often they arrived. So send a card to a friend or a loved one. You can't go wrong.... well, hopefully you won't. The rating on this site is a 7.5 out of 10.

http://www.tackymail.com/

The Basement Internet Show

You've got to start somewhere in life if you want to make a success of yourself. For many of us that mean starting at the bottom and working our way up. Today's Warped site is an interesting concept, one that literally starts in the basement, and is trying to work it's way up. Tune in and you'll see what I mean.

The name of the site is The Basement Internet Show. This is a show, broadcast on the Internet, that features recorded telephone interviews. It first went on the air in February 1999, and is host/created/ministered by Adam Bishops, a former AM radio disc jockey. All you need to tune in and listen is a media player that will play MP3 files, such as iTunes, WinAmp, or Windows Media player. There are links to past shows, as well as the current show. You can listen live, or download for later listening. Shows maybe rebroadcast or distributed as long as the Creative Common License that they are licensed under is followed.

This is an interesting concept in distributing this type of material. Since it started in 1999, before iPods were around, you couldn't really call this a Podcast. But that is what it is similar to. But it was here first, which earns it a 6.5 on our 1 to 10 rating scale.

http://www.basementshow.net/