Perpetual Bubblewrap

Today, we have a achieved a new high (or low, depending on your point of view) for the Warped site. After months of searching, I have finally found a totally worthless website. Not your average, ordinary worthless website, but one that serves not one function, except to be annoying to your fellow employees.

The name of the site is Perpetual Bubblewrap. As the name implies it involves bubblewrap, you know, the stuff that is used in packaging items when they are shipped. I don't think that there is one among us who has not had a piece of it in our hands, and started popping the bubbles. It can really be annoying. This website allows you to take the supplied bubblewrap, and pop all of the bubbles. From the website:

"For the ultimate in time wasting, simply roll your mouse over the bubble wrap to see and hear a satisfying 'pop' as the bubble bursts. Trouble is, the bubbles come right back after a bit, so it is - we are proud to announce - well and truly useless".

I have to admit that I spent a good ten minutes popping them, until my wife told me to stop. It is kind of addictive. The Warp-o-Meter gives this site the highest rating that we give, a solid 10.0, because we agree with the designer, this site is totally useless. My kinda site!

http://www.urban75.com/Mag/bubble.html

Authority for Universe Ownership

In the pioneer days, owning a piece of land was a sign of success. Today, owning your own home is the dream of many couples. But what about tomorrow? What happens when we run out of land on this planet? Well, I think today's Warped site has that covered.

The site is Authority for Universe Ownership. For the first time ever the Authority for Universe Ownership gives you the chance to purchase deeds to your own universe. A universe in which you are the rightful owner and emperor! This isn't a hoax (although I admit I looked for a link to the Brooklyn Bridge on the site).

Other sites may offer the chance of owning land on the moon or owning a star or galaxy. These offers may seem tempting, but consider, the enormous cost of traveling to the moon makes it unlikely that such an investment will be profitable for many decades to come, if at all. And let's face it, the moon is one of the least desirable places to live imaginable. It is utterly barren. The chances of ever traveling to another star are remote, let alone another galaxy! The best hope of interstellar travel at present is to create a wormhole taking you from one part of the universe to the other. But such a wormhole would be just as likely to take you to another Universe. Since traveling to another universe is no less likely than travelling to another star, would it not make more sense to own an entire universe? Especially when you can have a universe customized exactly how you want it.

But most important of all - this is totally FREE!! No money required! No down payments or mortgages. This what you've been waiting for. Just a couple of clicks, and PRESTO you are a universe owner. The Warp-o-Meter took advantage of this offer, and gives the site an 8.5 rating. I'm still waiting, but don't that hold you back. Hurry, before they're all gone.

http://www.youruniverse.co.uk/

CelebMatch

Have you ever wanted to date a famous Hollywood star? Or maybe that hunk of a sports figure that you saw on the local sports channel? While today's Warped site cannot help make those dreams come true, it does give you an idea of which celebrities you might be compatible with.

The name of the site is CelebMatch.com. Have you ever wanted to know how compatible your are with Britney Spears, Anna Kournikova or Brad Pitt? Have you ever wanted to know who's your most compatible celebrity love? Use this site to find out! CelebMatch.com uses the scientific method of biorhythms to calculate the compatibilities. Use CelebMatch.com to calculate your most compatible celebrity love or select a celebrity yourself and CelebMatch.com will show the compatibility.

While this site is for entertainment purposes only, it can give you something to talk about at the office cooler, or if you get a chance to meet that certain someone, well, you'll feel like you know them. The Warp-o-Meter gives this site an 8.0 rating.

http://www.celebmatch.com/

Apple Corps

One of the most popular children's toys is one called Mr. Potato Head. The name that The Beatles gave to their business empire was Apple Corps. What do these two items have in common? If I have your attention, then click and head on over to today's Warped Site.

Today's site is named Apple Corps, and, no, it is not a site that has anything to with the Fab Four. It has a little bit to do with Mr. Potato Head. Think of this site as a virtual Mr. Potato Head, but with a wider variety of vegetables to choose from. Apple Corps is played as simply as can be. What you should see when you play this game is some sort of vegetable on the left -- when you start, it's always an apple -- and a bunch of objects on the right and, on some screens, underneath the vegetable. What you see exactly depends on your computer and your browser. You not only have some vegetables to choose from, but also some political figures. The only one I recognized was the former President of the United States.

This is a way to cool site to kill some time on, whether you're at work or at home. I wonder why they didn't feature any faces of the other Apple Corps owners? Warped site rating: 7.5.

http://apple-corps.westnet.com/

WUMOR

It is better to be laughing that crying. It is better to be laughing than frowning. Laugh and the world laughs with you. By now you may have guessed that today when you enter the Warped Zone, the site will be funny, or hopefully, will be worth a chuckle or two. Without further ado, click on.

The name of the site is Wumor, or as it is subtitled, "There's no such thing as laughing too long or too loud". It features some of the most off-the-wall humor sites imaginable. If you are an Opie & Anthony fan, they have you dialed in. Looking for the Darwin Awards? They're here. There is a great list of comedians, from Monty Python, to Dennis Miller, George Carlin, Chris Rock, and Steven Wright. There are some great links to sites just to have fun at, and if you want to get some practical jokes, some links are provided. (Be sure to check our Mad Martian Eyeball Shop, okay).

Sometimes you just have to set the world aside, and explore the Internet. This site is one fun site to do that at. It's got some great links, and you won't be bored, that is a Warped Site guarantee. The rating on this site is 8.0.

http://thor.he.net/~komo/WUMOR.html

The Damnedest Thing I Ever Saw

There is a saying that seeing is believing. There is also a saying that a picture is worth a thousand words. Then there's the one that goes "been there, done that". Today's Warped site has a combination of those sayings, and probably some new ones that haven't even been thought of yet.

The name of the site is The Damnedest Thing I Ever Saw, The Damnedest Thing I Ever Did. It is authored by one Biscuit T. Tidwell, who is the world's foremost authority (about what he doesn't say). But he guarantees to answer all of your questions about Life , Liberty, the Pursuit of Happiness, Relationships, Girls, Guys, Auto - Truck Repair, Huntin', Fishin', Cookin', Camping, Mother-in-Laws, Bosses, Politics, Idiots and Love, Flyin', Computers, Coon Dogs, Wifey/Hubby Problems, Brats and more. There is a wide variety of subject matter here, from jokes on Naval Academy Plebes to family reunion photos. You can ask questions of Mr. Tidwell, and suggest sites to him as well.

This is a very warped site, one that is made better by the active user participation. The Warp-o-Meter gives this site an 8.0 rating.

http://www.rehearsals.com/

rehearsals.com

The Internet has changed how we communicate and how we interact with each other. Sites such as My Space and You Tube have helped that communication go from the written word to pictures to now videos. It has also changed how we are communicated with. Today's Warped site is one that has an interesting concept in how we are entertained, and how that may be changing over the next few decades.

The name of the site is rehearsals.com. It is an entertainment website, but one with a twist. Here you can see the musical acts of today as the get ready to tour, get ready to record in the studio, and even as they are working out the final writing of a song. This is a free site, one that has a lot of promise. It is a real intimate look into how the music of today is made. And these are not just some unknown garage band that has their work featured here. Some of the acts you can see here is the Mick Fleetwood and his band, Glen Campbell, Tom Petty, Chris Issak, and the Manhattan Transfer. There are not 30 or 40 second clips either. The one of the Manhattan Transfer is over 16 minutes.

In the future, this maybe the way we are entertained. Broadband internet access will open up so many different opportunities for all aspects of our life. This must be what is was like when the telephone was first invented, hey! Warped rating on this site is 7.5.

http://www.rehearsals.com/

Fig Bar Man For President

It is that time of year. The political season is almost over, thank goodness. But before you know it, every Tom, Dick, and Al will be announcing that they are running for the office of President. (and yes, I think John will be running again as well). I am so dreading this next election that I thought instead of waiting for those clowns to come to me, I would find my own candidate to support, and to heck with the others. That is what today's Warped site is all about.

The name of the site is Fig Bar Man for President. Some may laugh. Some may scoff. But Fig Bar Man vows to be the next President! And to show you he is serious, he is already accepting offers for Cabinet positions, and other offices in high places. Of course, he's a little slow, he still thinks Dole is running. But then, many people in high positions are living in the last century. This guy is no different. But at least he's honest, and for a politician, that is a real rarity.

So check out Fig Bar Man, the man of the people. Remember to write him in when you vote in 2008. He's been waiting since 1996, so he is ready and rarin' to go. The Warp-o-Meter is impressed, he gives his site a 7.5 rating.

http://home.epix.net/~wayne26/mrfigb/figbar.html

Frank's Vinyl Museum

Back in the days before iPods, Zens, and Zunes, back before CDs and cassette tapes, and even before the infamous 8-track tapes, the medium for music was something called records. There were also known as platters, spinners, and vinyl. Some of the music that was popular then did not make the transition to the other mediums. In some cases that is good, and in some cases that is bad. Today's Warped site looks at some of those items, and open up the nostalgia gates.

The name of the site is Frank's Vinyl Museum, The Internet Home of Weird Records. Like an everyday museum, the site features some of the most outlandish and unusual records ever collected in one place. These are all real records, some worth hundreds of dollars. What is featured, you ask? Well, after looking at some them, you might regret that question. For example:

"We're The Banana Splits" : the only known record of a group made popular by Saturday morning cartoons. Can you say Fleegle, Bingo, Drooper,and Snork.

"Parakeet Training Record" : a scientific way of teaching your pet bird to talk.

"Mrs. Miller's Greatest Hits" : who can forget her rendition of "Downtown" ? But a greatest hits LP? What happened to the others?

"Telly" : William Shatner wasn't the only 60's star to cut an LP. Who loves ya, baby?

These are just a few of the classics here. For anyone who wonders what the 60's (and 70's) were really like, this site is an interesting experience. The Warp-o-Meter gives this site an 8.0 rating.

http://www.franklarosa.com/vinyl/default.jsp

The Brandon Show

This is a red letter day in our house. Next week all three of my children will be college students (of one sort or another). So with that thought in mind, I thought it would be great to find a totally Warped website with a college state of mind. I looked around, and here is one that both parents and students can appreciate.

The name of the site is called The Brandon Show, and subtitled Your (Almost) Daily Home For College Survival. The Brandon Show began in the pages of the Monroe-Woodbury Senior High School Crusader newspaper on December 5th, 2000. The column started as a high school version of “Dear Abby” but later morphed into an observational humor column, which it remains today. Around the time of the newspaper column, Brandon started to get involved with the school’s radio station, WEXR 94.9fm. Brandon was under the illusion that despite a poor GPA (a 77), he could get into a good college if he was involved with many activities. The radio show consisted of lame sketches, heavy metal music, and on air bickering with co-hosts. The name, “The Brandon Show” came from an on air argument where one of Brandon’s co-hosts said, “This is not ‘The Brandon Show’.”

This site is essentially a blog site for the fans of the program but also contains a lot of information about what it is to be going to college these days. It is a riotous site for anyone with a warped sense of humor. Younger viewers will probably be more in tune than older ones, but there is definitely something here for all ages. The Warp-o-Meter gives this site a 7.5 rating, Phi Beta Logon.

http://www.thebrandonshow.com/

And The Bride Wore....

The happiest day of any woman should be her wedding day. But some ladies have a different opinion of what memorable should mean, and WOW, do they really take it to extremes sometimes. Today's Warped site has some of those more memorable moments.

The name of the site is And The Bride Wore. This site contains examples of strange, odd, and unflattering wedding accessories. The headings of the areas give a clue to what they contain, but even my imagination couldn't relate to some of the things that were conceived.

For example, in Dual-use Wedding Gowns, a couple of the entries are subtitled:

"This woman keeps bees in her spare time", and "Just one word... cupholders!".

Then there's Groom's Gloom:

"I understand after Pepe Le Pew is wearing this tux at this wedding".

Flower abuse yields:

"The only way to improve this dress would be to apply a little weedkiller".

For anyone who has been married and gone through all of the planning, this site will be a hoot. For anyone who is planning a wedding, this site contains some great ideas to avoid. The Warp-o-Meter gives this site a 7.5 rating.

http://www.visi.com/~dheaton/bride/the_bride_wore.html

75 Years of Band-Aid

The are something we all have used at one time or another. But have you ever wondered where they came from, and how they got to be so popular (and necessary). Tune in to this Warped site and you get, as Paul Harvey says, the rest of the story.

The name of the site is 75 Years of Band-Aid. This site tells the story of a new homeowner who found some interesting artifacts in their new house.

"It's about 50 years old, and pretty groovy in its own way. It seems that Mitch's family didn't like to throw anything away. They saved pretty much everything they could - when we moved in, the garage (which never had been cleaned out. It still hasn't) looked like a storage closet."

It seems the old homeowner, a family friend, left some interesting items for them to find.

"They saved pretty much everything they could - when we moved in, the garage (which never had been cleaned out. It still hasn't) looked like a storage closet. Small things, they stored in Band-Aid boxes. Stuff like nails, washers, bolts...anything that could possibly be reused. We must have unearthed two dozen boxes dating back to the 1950's. A few years later, Mitch moved in. But he's a bit of a slob, so the Band-Aid boxes remained unmolested until we arrived. What could I do, but share our found bit of history with you?"

So here is a short unofficial biography of the original band-aid. It started out as a brand name, and has become such an American icon that the term "bandaid" is now a generic term that has fallen into public use to describe it, no matter what the manufacturer calls it. The Warped-o-Meter gives this site a 7.5 rating.

http://www.savetz.com/bandaid/

Freaky Random Graphics

The daily Warped site not only tries to find the most unusual sites on the internet, but occasionally we try to perform a public service. Today's site is just such a site, one that is intended for the everyday computer user.

The site is called Freaky Random Graphics. It is a site that contains some interesting and weird graphics that can be used to enhance emails, websites and other computer type decorations. Some of the ones here are:

A Melting Head

Felix the Cat Pacing

Melting Ice Cube

Daisy w/Hay Fever

Flaming Blue Hand

There is nothing wrong with these graphics, they are just kind of cool to look at and would make a great enhancement to any web site. Well, almost any website, I guess. The Warped rating on this site is 7.5.

http://www.savetz.com/bandaid/

Save The Bald Beaver

Today's Warped site is a perfect example of a double ententre. If you are wondering what that means, you'll just have to follow along. And I will be once you get to the site, the majority of you will be wrong in what you are guessing the subject matter to be. So read on, dear visitor.

The name of the site is called Save the Bald Beaver. The North American Bald Beaver is the official symbol of Berlow Canada. The Bald Beaver attained official status as an emblem of Berlow when an "act to provide for the recognition of the Bald Beaver (clastor canadensis) as a symbol of the sovereignty of Berlow" received royal assent on March 24, 1935.

Here you will learn all about this creature of nature who spends most of his or her time in the water building dams and other things. For years their pelts were sought after by Europeans as hats, to the point of near extinction. There are some photos of them in action, and what trees look like after they are finished with them. A special spot for kids is set asides, as well as an online store.

Bet you thought this was going to be about something else, didn't you? That is what makes this site so cool, it really makes one think about what it is about, getting the anticipation built up, and then letting you down, not quite so gently. That is why this site gets a 9.0 on the old Warp-o-Meter.

http://www.savethebaldbeaver.org/

Soviet Calculators Collection

One of the most widely used inventions over the past 50 years has been the hand held calculator. Say what you want about it, this little gizmo has made our life so much easier. If you think I'm wrong, try taking a math class with a slide rule (remember those?). Many of the big names in electronics were involved in the evolution of these devices, HP, Texas Instruments. I even have an Atari one sitting on my desk. But they were not strictly an American innovation. Today's Warped site goes behind the former Iron Curtain to a place one would not associate with them.

The name of the site is the Soviet Calculators Collection. It is a site that has pictures and details about Soviet devices that were pretty unique. There are mechanical, electro-mechanical and electronic ones that are featured. It is quite interesting to see them and to realize just how many there were. Some of them may seem funny by today's comparisons, but they were functional, not vaporware. There are 145 models shown, along with some other interesting devices, such as watches, clocks, a chess computer, and even some Russian slide rules.

It may seem strange to think of such a country as the Soviet Union to have had the ability to design and build such complex electronics. But remember that the scientific programs that were developed achieved many scientific firsts, such as the first man made satellite, and other space technology feats. Without the space race, it is doubtful if we would have ever reached the moon, at least as fast as we did. The Warped rating on this site is a 7.5.

http://rk86.com/frolov/calcolle.htm

Visit Coral Castle

If you are ever in Florida (near Miami), and if you are looking for a different and unusual place to visit, then this may just be the place for you. It is castle that was carved out of coral rock as a labor of love by the artist.

The site is called Visit Coral Castle. It was created by one Edward Leedskalnin who was born in Riga, Latvia in 1887. He was engaged to be married to the love of his life when one day she called it off. Heartbroken and deeply saddened by this tragic loss, he set out on a lifelong quest to create a monument to his lost love that has culminated into one of the world’s most remarkable accomplishments. Ed’s unusual creation is called the Coral Castle, (it was originally called “Rock Gate Park”). Without any outside assistance or large machinery he single-handedly built the Coral Castle. He carved and sculpted over 1,100 tons of coral rock as a testimony to his lost love.

What makes this so unique is that while he was only 5 feet tall and weighed 100 pounds, he did all of this with only hand tools. He acquired these skill from working in lumber camps and stone masons in Latvia. The story of how he built this is unknown because he would not tell anyone. He also would not reveal how he moved the entire structure 10 miles when he was looking for privacy. Equally astonishing is how he made his money by giving tours, and what happened to the structures after he passed away.

So if you are looking for something to do on the next trip to Florida, this may be it. But you can also experience the gardens by visiting the site online as well. The Warp-o-Meter gives this site a 7.5 rating.

http://www.coralcastle.com/

strangemag.com

Looking for a good magazine to read? Something other than Time or Life or Newsweek? If so, then today's Warped site is one that will give some food for thought. But it is best appreciated if opened with an open mind.

The name of the site is strangemag.com. It is the online site for Strange Magazine. This is a publication that focuses on such issues as time travel, urban legends, hoaxes, supernatural monsters, ESP, parapsychology, and anomalies. Everything from Bigfoot, the Loch Ness monster, UFOs, ghosts and the Grim Reaper are covered within it's pages. Is short, it is a wide range of topics on things that go bump in the night.

So if you are tired of reading about the troubles of the world, overpaid athletes, and the ups and downs of tinsel town celebrities, then this is something worth looking at. But don't read if you are trying to go to sleep, it may keep you awake or give you nightmares. Warped rating is 8.5.

http://www.strangemag.com/

Watching Grass Grow

One of the benefits of growing up in the country was that life was slower. No rushing around trying to get everything done in one day. We watched the paint dry. We rolled the sidewalks up at 8:00 every night. We even watched the grass grow. It would be great to have a lifestyle like that in the rush-rush world of today. The Warped site is doing it's part, and has found a site that will let you enjoy some of that country living.

The name of the site is Watch The Grass Grow. Here you can watch the lawn of one man's lawn grow via webcam. It is updated every three seconds, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year. This project came as a result of the drought of 2002, when his lawn died. Since then, he has tried all sorts of ways to make it grow (all documented via the webcam). It may sound boring, but he has had over 250,000 viewers this year already. Word gets around I guess. There is also a companion site, Custom Home Construction. Here you can watch a house being built.

There is a lot going on at the site, with announcement of upcoming events. For example, on September 13 at 2:00PM MDT, the lawn will be mowed. There is also some watering times here as well. This site may not be the most exciting in the world, but at least there is always something going on. The site even looks great at 2:00AM thanks to the lighting that is there. Warped site rating: 8.5.

http://www.watching-grass-grow.com/

The Twisted World of Zooass

Here it is, the weekend, time to have some fun. So what better place to hang out but a good Internet game site. But in the true Warped spirit, it has to be one that is, well, warped! So head on over to Zooass.com and get ready to have some fun.

This is a truly warped gaming site. There are some interesting activities here. For example, you can play Escape From Neverland, and help Michael Jackson corral his little friends who are trying to get away. Then there is Beboobled, Pubert, and Boyband Blast-a-rama. But wait, there's more.

You can send postcards to friends, telling them how much fun you're having. There is a Joke of the Day, a Drink of the Week, and a newsletter. One of my favorites was the Bathroom Wall, where visitors can submit pictures of their favorite bathroom wall art. This site is definitely for user participation (just check out the Girls section, if you are chauvinistic enough to).

This is a great Warped site. We give it a 10.0 rating, one of the few we have given out (and the second in a week. We must be getting soft). But enjoy your time here, take a break, and we'll get back on it next week.

http://www.zooass.com/

Ultraville

Life got you down? Looking for a place to do something outside of the daily grind? If so, then today's Warped site is on that you will definitely want to spend some time at. After all, it's been on the Internet for 150 years.

The name of the site is Ultraville. This is the stop on the Internet for weary web surfer who really wants a change of pace. Be warned, this site has some extreme adult-oriented content. Nothing worse than you would hear in primetime television, but it is presented a little different. For example, check out the Sexxmine - it is not what it appears to be. The Piercing Place is the only one on the web that does its thing via cyberspace. Then there's the Kouples Konnection, the Book Klub, the Klaxon newspaper (be sure to read the article about Gallagher), and Ultraville University.

The humor and sarcasm at this site is so unreal it is sick. Sick as in warped. That is why the Warp-o-Meter gives this site a 10.0 as it really shows how "warped" the Internet can really be when it wants to.

http://www.ultraville.com/

Pump Up & Kick Ass With the Navy SEALS

The comedian Steve Martin used to claim to be a wild and crazy guy as part of his stage act. Well, today's Warped site is on that has some wild and crazy guys who will make him look like a real woossie, but whom we owe a huge thank you to, for without them, we might not enjoy all of the freedoms we have.

The site is called Pump Up & Kick Ass With The Navy SEALS. The SEALS are a special contingent of US Navy sailors who perform some of the most secret and dangerous missions that our military undertakes. SEALS is an ancronym for SEa Air and Land, for they are at home on all three. At this site you can find out what it takes to be a seal, and if you want, learn the physical fitness programs that they undertake before, during and after training. (Most will argue that there is no "after" training, that they are constantly training). The staff that produces this information includes both active duty and veteran SEALS, as well as other specialists.

The information here is not for everyone. But if you think you have what it takes to be one of the best of the best, check it out, then check out your Navy recruiter. The Warped rating on this site is 8.5, and a big HOO YAH to all of the men of the SEAL teams that are defending our country tonight.

http://www.navysealteams.com/

1969 Woodstock Festival & Concert

They say if you can remember the '60's, you probably weren't around then. That statement is always open to interpretation. I mean, man, what do you mean by remember? But for those of us whose memories are getting a little hazy, thank God for the Internet, and sites such as today's Warped site. C'mon, breakfast in bed for 400,00?

The name of the site is the 1969 Woodstock Festival & Concert. The actual name of the event was the Woodstock Music & Art Fair, but everyone remembers it as Woodstock (those who can remember it anyway). This legendary event was the apex of the love generation, the best of times and the worst of times. It was the greatest collection of musicians to appear anywhere, a line up that would never ever be repeated. IT was tried, but it never happened. The Grateful Dead were there, contrary rumors, along with Jefferson Airplane, Creedence Clearwater Revival, Melanie, Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young, Richie Havens, and Jimi Hendrix, among others.

Here you can visit (or revisit) or learn about this icon of the 60's culture. The music was great, the whole atmosphere was one of peace, love, and togetherness. Wouldn't it be nice to have it now. The Warp-o-Meter gives this site a 9.0 rating, I guess it does remember those good old days.

http://www.woodstock69.com/

Anomalies Unlimited

Have you ever thought about the odd things that make up our lives? Urban legends, little known odd facts, that sort of thing. I am reminded of a quote from a John Wayne movie, "When the legend becomes fact, print the legend". Today's site is something like that, but it also has some very interesting verifiable facts as well.

The site is called Anomalies Unlimited. Here you will find information about ghosts, alien writings, optical illusions, and Disney. In the Disney area, you can find out about infamous Disney legends surrounding the Little Mermaid, Jessica Simpson, and the Lion King. Under religion, you can see such infamous sites as the Chicago Holy Virgin salt stain and the Virgin Mary on a Window in Brazil. Of special interest to travelers is the section on the Denver Airport, and for all of us, the Underground Bases section has some eye opening statistics.

So you think that you have something interesting and out of the ordinary in your life? Well, look at this page, and you'll see whether you do or don't. Drop them a line and they'll be happy to take a look at it. Warped rating on this site is 9.0.

http://anomalies-unlimited.com/

Pets In Uniform

The Blue Star Mothers is an organization that supports families who have sons and daughters in the military service. But times change, and in an era when, according to Paul Harvey, we treat our kids like pets and pets like kids, a site like today's Warped site was just waiting to happen.

The name of the site is Pets In Uniform. Imagine, your dog, cat, or other pet in service to our nation, and in full military regalia. This site makes this fantasy a reality. Using the latest digital techniques, They combine a photo of your pet with the uniform and background of your choice. So it can now be Private Bozo or Admiral Whiskers, and you can display it proudly in your den or your dog-house.

This is an interesting site for the pet owner whose life revolves around their pet. The Warped site rating for this site is 8.0. Remember, support our troops, they are the reason that we are the land of the free and the home of the brave.

http://www.petsinuniform.com/

The Church of the Sub Genius

Every so often, a site arises from the ashes of the Internet that just defies description. Today's site is just such a site. At first glance I thought is was a new age religious site. Then I thought it might be about the ace of office support, Bob from Accountemps. Now I'm just not too sure. Take a look and see if it makes any sense to you.

The name of the site is The Church of the Sub Genius. There are links to stores, events, questions, a Stark Fist(?) and their Radio. To get a feeling for what this site is about, here is what they put under the heading "Become an Ordained Minister Now..." :

"The exciting new do-it-yourself virus we invented for the SubGenius Art Mines is spreading throughout our website, sometimes spilling over even into the so-called "reality" that we SubGenii are forced to share with the humans. The vigorous health of this virus is the result of its careful design by an ever-growing team of SubGenius coders -- Slack-filled young men and women of Yeti descent who are spread, SEEMINGLY randomly, throughout the breakthinking world... but are bent on breaching all Earthly human political and cultural barriers with the searing nonhuman truth of the Word of "Bob": J.R. "Bob" Dobbs, that LIVING GOD WHO WALKS THIS PLANET EARTH IN HUCKSTER'S SHOES."

Confused? Now you know how I felt after spending sometime here. At first I thought it was the pain meds from my recent surgery. But since I hadn't taken any today, so it has to be the site. The Warp-o-Meter gives this site a 9.5 rating. This is what Warped sites are all about.

http://www.subgenius.com/index.html

The International Center For Bathroom Etiquette

Okay, which way is it. Seat up or seat down? Which way does the paper hang? Wax on or wax off? These questions have plagued mankind for years, and there doesn't seem to be any solid answers. Or at least there wasn't until today 's Warped site was discovered.

The name of the site is The International Center for Bathroom Etiquette. Why, you may ask is there a need for any kind of behavior in the men's room? Why not? We're no all animals. Well, most of us aren't anyway. But have you ever wondered about when it is appropriate to talk in there? What do you do with stalls without walls? HOW do you hang the toilet paper? And most importantantly, what do you do WHEN YOU REALLY GOTTA GO? Have no fear, it is all explained here, and in understandable language and even some pictures.

Yes, here the answer of when to leave the seat up (and why), and how to educate complainers. There is workplace etiquette, home etiquette, and truckstop etiquette (VERY important). The Warped site rating for this site is 9.5, which shows how important we think it really is.

http://www.icbe.org/icbe.shtml

Name That Candybar

It's the start of a long weekend, so let's have a warped site that is just for fun. Everyone likes a good candy bar, I'm sure. At my local Fry's Store, the checkout line has them all over the place, for that last minute shopping. Everyone can identify their favorite bars by just looking for the wrapper (with me, it's the red wrapper of the Rocky Road). But what would happen if suddenly there were no wrappers? Take a look at today's site, and you'll see what I mean.

The name of the site is Name That Candybar. Here you are given a selection of bars without wrappers, and a cross sectional view (just like you took a bite out of one). Can you identify them? Can you find your favorite? It's not that difficult if you really think about it. But then who thinks about candybars when you're eating them?

The Warp-o-Meter gives this site an 8.5 but it's still hunting for that Rocky Road. If you see it, drop us a line. We seem to have misplaced it.

http://www.smm.org/sln/tf/c/crosssection/namethatbar.html